The Wrong Question

I spend quite a bit of time examining my mind and heart throughout the course of the day. I'm not sure whether this habit serves as evidence of growing in Godliness or not, sometimes I think that I'm just someone who finds himself far too interesting. In fact I know I find myself too interesting. Thats not what I want to write about, however. Several weeks ago, during one of these introspective sessions, the question occurred to me "Do You Need God?". I spent some time examining whether I felt like I needed God, whether I felt myself as being intimately connected to God, or whether I just wanted God for various reasons but that I didn't need Him. (for all you philosophers, yes, I am quite aware of the difference between feeling and thinking, but sometimes in spiritual matters it is hard to discern which is which). In all honesty, my answers for the first two questions were "no, I don't feel as though I need God and no, I don't feel intimately connected to Him". This bothered me, but in my obsessing over my emotional alienation from God is occurred to me that I was asking myself the wrong question at that moment, and that I had probably been doing so my entire life. It occurred to me that my need for God isn't something that waxes and wanes, or that really in any way in dependent on me. Instead, I am in need of God whether I am aware of it or not. In fact, to be human is to be in need of God. I live in a constant state of dependency on Him.

This is important to understand for a host of reasons, but here is why it applies to my original idea. I was in a place of not seeing my need for God, and it opened my eyes why sin of any kind is so destructive. Yes, it can have social and personal physical ramifications, but I think the real problem is sin tells us we have no need for God. Sin tells us that our sex drive, our desire for success, our desire for completion, our desire to work hard, our desire for friendship, etc, can all be satisfied fully without God, that they are all on requal standing with God. God then becomes another pawn in our pursuit of happiness rather than the chief object of our desire and aspiration. The Creator becomes, in a very real way, another part of the created world, wherein you can choose either to be fully satisfied by a career or a marital (or just romantic, or just sexual) relationship or pursuing a dream or by dedicating your life to the Lord, or at least thats what sin wants us to think.

When dealing with the living, active, personal God of the Bible, we are not interacting with ANOTHER way to be happy in a long line of equally fulfilling options. We are interacting with the ONLY thing that can fulfill our desires. In the salvific act, God isn't only saving you from the dominion of sin, He is also saving you from yourself and your skewed perceptions and desires that would have you think that your longing can be fulfilled according to your fancies and whims. Sin's first lie isn't that a bad thing is good, its that a good thing can replace God.